As we walk into work most days, my co-workers and I are able to see the work we have to do for the night. More often than not, there are complaints about the amount of work if it is one of those busy days. Sometimes, I join is as well as if I am getting paid to go to work and be a social butterfly. However, a couple of weeks ago while having a conversation with a new co-worker, I realised that perspective can make any situation achieve a 180 turn. To him, the work was job security. When he came into work and saw a lot to do, it made him happy. His previous job had been in a company that had to shut down because the recession created a lack in sales resulting in a diminished to non-existent workload and eventually the company shut down. So according to him, when he came in and saw a lot of work, he felt like his future was secure at least for a little longer. I was amazed at how true that statement rang and it has done wonders for my attitude on extremely trying and busy days: I know that at the end of the day when I look around and still see some more work to be done on my return, that I am luckier than most and thankful to have a job.

Sometimes, one of the hardest things to do it provide an objective ear to a friend with an emotional problem. Because we are not emotionally tied to the situation, it can be very hard not to come across as judgemental. In my striving to become a better person, I can look back now and see instances where in I was not the best friend and I can also see how being able to truly take a step back and look at the situation from the other person’s point of view can be extremely beneficial to the friendship.  Furthermore, of course the easiest road to this path is the tried and true experience. I was not the most emotional person in college and while most of my friends were having relationships and dealing with the drama of it all, I seemed to float about in a bubble of obliviousness. My best friend at the time was going through some turmoil with her boyfriend and every time she would ask my opinion, I would give it to her very directly and harshly without censoring myself: I did not like the boy. I thought he was not worth her time. He was stupid and childish and she was acting the same way by being with him. Inevitably, this caused the demise of our friendship. As I look back now, I still contend that the boy was an idiot, but I know that I could have handled the situation better. Instead of calling him names and telling her she was being stupid, I could have tried to get her to see where I was coming from and if that failed, simply being a support system for her.  I am very proud of myself for how far I have come with that very open-minded attitude. Recently, I walked into a conversation about someone who had just left her husband. Everyone in the conversation was bashing her and being overly judgmental. As I walked away, I had to smile to myself because most of the people in that conversation had an issue that could easily be related to hers but it seems easier to remove the speck of sand from another’s eye while we have an entire semi hanging out of ours. I continue to push myself to new limits with how I view and approach the world. I had someone tell me once that I am too open-minded because I will find a way to explain anything so that I can accept it. If there is such a thing, then I am extremely proud to be too open-minded!!



I hate rejection. Plain and simple. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. I try to avaoid it at any cost and will cross the ocean, not just the road to avoid this. So what do I miss out on because of this debilitating fear? Opportunities, experiences and developing an immunity to it. I am usually ashamed to admit this but I figure, what the heck, this is 2011 and in my journey to become my more authentic self, there is no need for lies. Therefore, if you like me, come and tell me becuase if I like you I will not come to you!!

NB: It is past 3 in the morning, I think I might be a little delirious from a fever and should probably not be posting this but I will anyway.

New Year…resolutions and such.

This new year, 2011, I resolve to have no resolutions. I am not sure who started this tradition but I am yet to meet someone who kept their new year’s resolution all year. Some fail the very day!! I compare this to making beginning of the week resolutions. Why do we feel the need to commence a particular action at the start of a time cycle. I find that the best resolutions are made spontaneously with no regard to time and space continuum. When I decided to go natural, I just woke up one morning and decided that I was done with the creamy crack. Presently, I am contemplating locing my hair and have been going back and forth about it for a while.  I briefly considered ushering in the new year by starting them then, but that sounded like a resolution to me and I scrapped that plan. I know that when it does eventually happen it won’t be because I make a promise to myself to do so at the start of the week.  It will just happen and that is what resolutions should be; spontaneous acts that occur because we have resolved that we are ready for change regardless of the time of the year.  

That being said, I do want to continue my journey towards self growth, becoming a better person-mentally, spiritually, fundamentally. I plan to continue being environmentally conscious, continue eating healthy, and being a little more selfish. Yes I said being selfish. I am plenty selfish as is, but I think I need to go up a notch or two. Oftentimes, I put others ahead of myself either because I don’t value myself enough, or I don’t want to hurt a person’s feelings or because I am trying to avoid confrontation. Well, I am going to work on that!! No mas!!